Michael says he doesn't sleep at night
he likes the quiet and aloneness
Asks me if I'm afraid of him
and I told him the love I have for my brother
is weightless and there's no fear
But maybe love is nosey and wants competition
Maybe love is deferred
until silence chokes on isolation
Michael says he loves me now
Michael says he loses his balance
and he's fell twice in a week
goes sockless now, feet swells out of his shoes
Pulls his shirt up, shows me his bruise
Michael still believes in fairytales
and wonders what I think
Misses what could have been
Michael romantizes the abandoned words
the dark hours, misses his brothers
Doors are closing, relationships folding
Older age approaching
But I never ask what he thinks of me
Michael remembers the November road to a past life
When he comes over we reminisce about our loved ones
and I say, "at least they're not in pain anymore, their heartache is over"
And he tells me, "well we don't know what the soul goes through once we leave here"
Now sunshine in the graveyards feel a little colder
Michael counts our parents sins
Goes for beer on a midnight run, has few close friends
he no longer trusts anyone
Misses childhood, still watches Captain Kangaroo
Says the hard life he had to live has made him hard this way
But I refuse to
I love you Michael - Vanessa
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