Tuesday, August 23, 2016

Re-Imagine Me (thoughts of a bullied teen)

an aesthetic life wasn't meant to be mine
planted, they say I will never fly
that my dreams will never see the light
loneliness is my best friend
I don't mind being abandoned by those 
whose blood is twin to my own
I don't mind being left alone
It's ok you forgot me, I forget me too
I embrace being ostracized, I am the odd one after all
so unlike you
It's ok you made fun of me
I didn't matter to anyone anyway
I was transparent, you had no choice
without color I disappeared in life's landscape
It's ok you wanted me out of sight
I am just a plain wallflower
It's alright you never loved me
your actions spoke for you
you said tomorrow doesn't matter
lived only for today
why tell that to someone you left
empty handed, displaced
robbed of innocence, you never knew
drained of opinions, denied the truth
no voice, no power, a child of invisibility
piece by piece you ignored, constantly stole from 
and changed all I would ever be
wish I could re-imagine me

on the outside of the inside
not good enough to be good enough
there's comfort in becoming used to being unloved
I have no expectations
I ask for nothing
I love going nowhere, living in hell, loving it
you expected no thing of me
I don't expect you to accept me
breathing isn't life
coloring in black between invisible lines
I disappear sporadically to your joy
I should never have been entrusted with breath
I could not handle the responsibility
I do not know how to correctly love
so I opt for feeling nothing , my pain is useless
tears you say are weakness
here I am, you spoke it over me
I am the no one you always said I'd be
becoming comfortable in my own un-comfortability
Forever lost, a daughter, a sister, once a friend
buried in pain
wish I could re- imagine me 



This poem is for those who have been mistreated in life by situations and people you had no control over. Re- imagine 
everything.


 

Monday, August 15, 2016

Teal

side streets disappear like snow
and skinny boys hold court
with laughter,  smiling at girls
they don't know
leaning in,  leaning back
like still shots in a frame
little drips of life
teal,  white and black
long hair on him and friends
it makes him more angelic
and kind of fragile


at home on the night train
a poet writing letters
that read like a soap opera
about how he sometimes
wants things that don't want him
and loved ones that don't know yet
what love is


he's slipping like watercolors
in someones perfect painting
always fading into a cloud
of a surreal blue sky
leaving you
looking for a little more
of something that you never
really see


but he's guilty of making his girl cry
because he had a good summer
without her


and he won't go home again
or stand in the rain with a brother
the nights are different now
the air warmer
his friends have adopted him
and when he smiles its like
summer light and teal
but he has a plan
a dream to catch
and words that wait to heal


This is a poem that was featured on The Back Road cafe that belongs to a twitter friend of mine @DaleRominger 
He is looking to feature some poets and their poetry on his blog so if you might be interested contact him by dm on twitter, he's really a nice person and I appreciate him very much.

Also I've been a bit absent on here because of a poetry book I am composing, so sorry about that. If you think Teal would be a good title for my book please let me know in a comment.

Thanks to all who drop by and read and I am always looking for creative blogs to follow that actually follow back. I appreciate all my blog followers and readers and send much love to those who have supported me, you know who you are :)

Monday, August 8, 2016

collage

rain on the door hinges remind me
of the silver creeping like a rogue
in your hair
the green, gold flecks in their watchful eyes
the rough of your hands 
the songs that we sang
the sunsets that lingered
the dawns that arrived too early
but at least they left you by my side 
your tears
loved under sheets
crowded rooms,  a happy but lonely life 
hungry people - all the empty hours
we couldn't ignore or give away
paper dreams damp from rainy coasts
songs, poems, light and dark
screened in porches that we never wanted
to leave
pictures of love stolen while we're asleep
pennies of others that moved on long ago
line breaks and soul breaths
left us staring at all the pretty leaves
that blew in from the street
lets allow them to decorate our hall
for awhile

 
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